A Tale Of Two Ceremonies

On a fairly regular basis these days, we hear about some new attempt at breaking a Guinness World Record.  It's typically something very odd and not at all useful, like the world's largest popcorn ball or the world's largest group hug.

With that in mind, I would now like to submit setting a new useless record earlier this month:  The first ever invited, attending guest at a gay wedding, a catholic priest ordination, and an interracial wedding, all within the span of seven days in the state of Iowa.  I have no proof, but I defy anyone to tell me it's been done before.

But this blog entry isn't going to be about setting records.  It's going to be about the gay wedding and the religious ordination, and the wild juxtaposition of those two events.

I don't want to spend the time or words to describe everything I saw and/or experienced at these occasions.  Instead, I'm going to break it down like this.....

Within a week's time, I attended two ceremonies.  I'd describe one of those ceremonies as joyful, colorful, and spontaneous.  The other I'd describe as subdued, dark, and ritualistic.

One of the ceremonies promoted working together as equals to create a better life.  The other ceremony literally called for the obedience of one party to another.

One of the ceremonies was a manifestation of newer civil rights in America.  The other ceremony went out of its way to applaud the recent elimination of long-standing civil rights.

One of the ceremonies seemed like it was the start of a relationship with unlimited growth potential.  The other ceremony seemed like it was the start of a relationship destined to shrink in size and value.

And ultimately, one of the ceremonies was completely non-judgmental, while the other ceremony judged the first to be depraved and worthy of being banned.

Notice that I haven't identified which event I believed them to be.  Which do you think was which?

Don't get me wrong, I care for the people involved in all of these ceremonies, including the aforementioned interracial marriage.  The (young) participants chose to make an open public expression of their love for someone or something else, and I was among hundreds or family members and friends there to unconditionally support them.

That said, I've never experienced a greater feeling of dissonance than I did during those seven days.

Dear Graduating Class of 2022

After two years of restrictions, it seems we re-emerged to a more normal time of high school and college graduation ceremonies.  So without further adieu, time for my annual address:

To the graduating class of 2022,

So, did it seem normal?  Your senior year, I mean.

The last two graduating classes had their senior years ruined, or at least interrupted, by a pandemic.  Yours was more like the pre-pandemic days, with the possible exception of having to wear a piece of cloth over your face from time-to-time. (But curiously, not when you were jammed together at extra-curricular school activities.)

If it did seem normal, I hope you enjoyed it, because if you're doing it right, that should be the end of your 'normal' for a very long time.  You'll either be going to a different school or starting a job.  Either way, the salad days of letting your family take care of you are over.

I had to say should be over, because these days, a great many of you will still be living with your family.  I'm well aware of the reasons why -- too many expenses, not enough income, blah blah blah.  These are things you could have mitigated with a little planning and grit.  And perhaps one more thing.....a better job by your family.

Yep, if you aren't ready to graduate, I want to say that's all on you, but I can't do that anymore.  There are too many complicit parents / families who are more than willing to let you stay at home for as long as you want, with virtually no accountability from you.  It's beyond weird that this happens, but it's almost become routine, and the pandemic made it even worse.

So you're probably asking, why should I make life hard on myself when I can live at home with free room and board and car and laundry service and probably much more?

I have one good answer -- because you're missing out on the prime fun years of your life!  That bulletproof age that exists around your early twenties, when you're young and can be both responsible and irresponsible at the same time.  You aren't going to get the most out of that by living at home.

Go to college.  Get a job.  Find roommates, or for that matter, just a mate.  But for the love of god, don't let your family allow you to stay in the same house where you grew up.

Don't let that be your normal.